Here’s a little story about me. When I was a mom of little ones one word kept popping up in every podcast, every Bible Study, and every book. It was a challenging word that hung darkly over my mind like this morning’s thick mist: intentional. Being told to be intentional in my parenting felt so demanding, so daunting and so daily. Survival: that was the goal most days. But parenting purposefully, with a plan and goals and expectations? That seemed impossible to even imagine. Nevertheless, I knew God was prompting me to be a more intentional parent, whatever that meant.
I started and stopped (AKA quit) many attempts at intentionality with devotions, chores, quality time, bedtime prayers, and dozens of other initiatives. I’m sure many of you are consistent rock stars with charts and calendars and plans and things. I was not.
But there was one way that I managed to be consistently intentional. I was determined to really know my kids. I became a student of them. What made them laugh? What frustrated them? What were their interests? How were they growing and changing? What were their “love languages?” Where was childish foolishness slipping into patterns of willful rebellion?
By God’s grace I simply wanted to intentionally know them as unique, interesting, developing individuals made in God’s image. Not just little people. But people-people.
(God thought it would be funny to introduce identical twins as an added bonus challenge).
Knowing my kids has been a rewarding lifelong study. I have watched them willfully irritate each other, bully, manipulate, judge, gossip, be lazy and irresponsible, waste time, waste money, procrastinate, and repeatedly crash their cars. But I have also watched them overcome intense fears, deal with toxic friendships, deflect peer pressure, work hard to achieve goals, defend each other, befriend the lonely, wake themselves up early to spend time with Jesus, and devote themselves to following Him forever.
Intentionally studying them helped me be able to disciple them through the hard times and celebrate with them in the victories. Now that they are grown adults, I’m really glad I know them. Turns out they are pretty cool people-people.
So that is my story about how once upon a time God challenged me simply with the word “intentional” and how that affected my focus as a mom. I hope this encourages you wherever you are on your parenting journey. What is God’s challenge for you right now? Is He asking something of you that seems too demanding, daunting, or daily? That very challenge may be His way to bring you great reward next year or in a decade or two. He is faithful. You can trust Him.
“Trust in the Lord, and do good; dwell in the land and befriend faithfulness” (Psalm 37:3).
