I am currently doing an in-depth study of The Sermon on the Mount, the longest sermon of Christ recorded in the Bible and found in Matthew chapters 5-7. It’s not for the faint of heart.
If you feel like you’re “doing just fine” following Jesus or you haven’t felt a strong conviction of the Holy Spirit lately…may I recommend to you a frequent reading of The Sermon on the Mount? My soul is continually tenderized by the challenging and demanding expectations of my Lord and King.
One such teaching is this:
“So if you are offering your gift on the altar, and there you remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled with your brother or sister, and then come and offer your gift” (Matthew 5:23-24).
In other words: God would rather see us take personal responsibility for our bad behavior to someone even before we come to Him in worship. If we know we’ve done something wrong or hurtful or offensive to someone…and we haven’t made it right yet to the best of our ability…don’t presume that we can just act in front of God like nothing happened.
Putting that kind of reconciliation into practice with our friends and siblings, and colleagues is a challenging command to be sure. Yet I’d like to take it one step further and ask: What would it be like to apply this passage with our children?
Not trying to get in your business or anything, but when was the last time you sinned against your kid? Treated them with rudeness, impatience, anger or cruelty? Or set them an example of behavior that is not Christlike?
I’m sad to say, some examples from my own life would be:
- Yelling at other drivers on the road and therefore setting an example of impatience and lack of self-control.
- Ignoring my children when they tried to get my attention because I was more interested in _____ (a podcast, phone app or football game).
- Overreacting when they make a mistake.
- Causing them to feel unworthy of my love and affection.
- Blaming my bad behavior and attitude on them.
I believe parenting is the hardest job on the planet. None of us do it perfectly, or even very well most days. But the important thing is what do we do when we mess up with our kid?
Or, in other words…When was the last time you apologized to your child?
Boy oh boy. It takes self-awareness. It takes humility. It takes flat-out obedience to that command from the sermon on the mount in a way that might look something like:
“So if you are driving to church to drop off your bags of Fall Fest candy and there you remember that your teenager has something against you, pull the car over. First text a sincere apology for your sarcasm, passive aggressiveness, and angry outburst toward your child. Then continue on your way to offer your gift.”